Posted on Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Grammar
I think the tendency toward self-flagellation for grammatical errors, both real and imagined, must be a uniquely English trait. I read a handful of blogs from England regularly and am always amused at the frequency of parenthetical apologies for splicing infinitives and dangling participles. These crop up, not only in the middle of posts, but in the comments too! And if one isn’t quick to acknowledge their own grammatical infractions with an immediate mea culpa, there’s sure to be a subsequent commenter to gleefully dissect them in full public view.
I read at least as many American blogs and can’t remember a single instance of any such apology appearing in them. The closest I’ve seen are a few writers who occasionally need to unburden the guilt that results from the gratuitous use of italics, bold type, and parentheses. These writers, however, seem to feel guilty about these trespasses not because they are somehow in error, but merely because they are an unnecessary indulgence—much the same way I feel about chocolate. The mere admission that they know these habits are somehow wrong seems to empower them to carry on committing them anyway, just like acknowledging, “I really shouldn’t have any more,” makes taking yet another Hershey Kiss from the candy dish seem reasonable.
My best theory is that Americans can maintain such a casual stance toward grammar because we speak a language that isn’t named for our country. It’s easy for us to shrug off the finer points of grammar and revert to communicating with grunted phrases such as “and stuff like that,” and “ya know what I mean?” because there’s no element of national pride in it for us. But I guess if you’re English and can’t expertly navigate the English language, you have slightly more at stake.
Then again, maybe Americans have simply played fast and loose with the language since we held certain truths to be self-evident. Who knows?
But let’s hear it for the English language. Without it, we’d be left to attempt to communicate solely through gestures. And anyone who ever drives a freeway could easily predict how that would affect international relations.
On a completely unrelated topic, I had to remind Howser tonight that, since I’ve already had all the children I intend to conceive, if I can’t rely on him for yard work and the occasional minor automotive repair, he’s really out-lived his usefulness to me. Sometimes only the blunt approach works when it comes to getting his potted ass out from in front of the computer. I think Dr. Phil would call this “Tough Love.”
Ol' Hoss told me to come over and give you a *HUG*.